


Secretly Falling Apart

by RetiredDragon



Category: Friday Night Dinner (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternative Girl, Alternative Girl OFC, Alternative Girl Reader, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Childhood Friends, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Gratuitous Smut, My First Smut, Pierced OFC, Pierced Reader, Pining, Reader-Insert, Shameless Smut, Smut, Tattooed Reader, tattooed ofc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-05-02
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:55:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23966497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RetiredDragon/pseuds/RetiredDragon
Summary: You grew up with the Goodmans as your next-door neighbours. A couple of years younger than Jonny,  the two of you became inseparable until you moved to Wales at the age of fifteen. You kept in contact and remained close friends, with Jonny often coming to visit you in Wales.Though usually Jonny would come to Wales to visit you, you were down in London and Jackie had insisted you stay at the Goodmans' family home, with Jonny also staying with them for the duration of your visit.What could go wrong? A great many things of course._____Main character is a bit 'alternative', as I thought that could be an interesting take.Warning: Story contains smut!_____
Relationships: Jonny Goodman/OC, Jonny Goodman/OFC, Jonny Goodman/Original Charcter, Jonny Goodman/Original Female Character, jonny goodman/reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 33





	Secretly Falling Apart

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE READ AUTHOR'S NOTE:
> 
> Was writing this last week thinking "there's no way the season 6 finale will mess up my story, but I'll wait for the ep to air before I post just in case"
> 
> ...Well, it really fucked up my story. 
> 
> SO you can either ignore the finale  
> OR, for the sake of this story, you can go along with my headcanon: that, for whatever reason, Lucy ended up not having the baby and Jonny was quite relieved about this. Their relationship broke down after this and Lucy left him. She met a lovely (way more mature) man who she married & together they had a lovely baby girl. Adam's Lucy still keeps in contact with her.
> 
> Jonny's Lucy seemed super great & I want her to be happy! She just didn't fit with my story :/

It had been years since I’d visited the Goodmans in their house, next door to where I used to live. I had known them pretty much my entire life, as my parents had lived in the house next door when I was born. I was a couple of years younger than Jonny, but as I grew up, the two of us became best friends. I was close with Adam too, of course, but Jonny and I were inseparable.

That is, until I moved to Wales at the age of fifteen. I was devastated. Jonny had been pretty much my only friend and, if I was being totally honest with myself, I was a little bit infatuated with him. It took me a long time to forgive my parents for moving me so far away from him, but I eventually grew to love Wales.

Jonny and I kept in contact, of course, and remained close friends. Being a couple of years older than me, he got to do a lot of stuff before me, like leave school and learn to drive, so he would often come to visit me in Wales. He even ended up going to university in Bath after his gap year, which was a lot closer to me. During his years there we spent a lot of time together and grew, if possible, even closer. And as we grew closer, so too did my feelings for him.

Jonny and I grew up to be vastly different people, and I often joked that if we met today we would not become such fast friends; Jonny got a job as an estate agent, and I became a tattoo artist, with my very own studio. But despite our differences, and the long-distance (and my ridiculously long-lasting crush on him), we stayed the closest of friends.

Though usually, Jonny would come to Wales to visit me (an excuse for the two of us not to have to visit his parents together), I was down in London working at a tattoo convention for the weekend and had decided to take the following week off to spend some time with Jonny.

When Jackie had found out, she had insisted I stay at the Goodmans' family home rather than a hotel, and I felt unable to refuse. Jonny had decided to try to make the situation less awkward by volunteering to stay with them as well for the duration of my visit, in his childhood bedroom. Jackie was apparently thrilled at the idea of having the two of us staying with her.

Jonny had asked me to wear clothing that covered the majority of my tattoos and, knowing what his family were like, I understood why. I wasn’t offended at all, some people just weren’t as keen on tattoos as I was, and I didn’t want to embarrass Jonny indirectly when he parents started questioning me about mine. I hadn’t seen his parents in over ten years so I already knew there were going to be questions about other elements of my aesthetic such as my hair and piercings, and I didn’t want to add to the inevitable awkwardness by having a full sleeve of tattoos on display as well.

Luckily, I had no tattoos on my hands, or anywhere above my collar, so the ones I had were easy to hide. I decided to wear a long-sleeved black blouse, with a black and grey pleated skirt, and long black stockings. That way the only tattoo that might be visible would be the one on my wrist. I packed some less conservative clothes for the convention and days out with Jonny, plus a couple of cardigans to wear over my normal stuff whilst I was around Jackie and Martin, just in case.

The train journey from Wales to London was a long one, with many changes, and by the time I reached my stop I was slightly irritable. I slung my large backpack over my shoulder and dragged my heavy suitcase through the barrier and across the bridge to where I knew Jonny would be waiting for me with his car.

As soon as I stepped into the street I was spotted by a very excited Jonny - I guess I was hard to miss with my colourful dyed hair and bright silver puffer jacket - who instantly pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. Butterflies exploded in my tummy and my heart started beating about twenty times faster than was healthy. The irritation that had built up over my day-long journey seemed to melt away at Jonny’s touch.

“Good to see you too, Jonny.” I sighed, relaxing into the hug and wrapping my spare arm loosely around him, inhaling his scent.

“I missed you.” He mumbled against the top of my head.

My heart skipped a beat, but I didn’t say anything back.

“Shall we get going?” He smiled, as he eventually released me, “Mum’s so excited to see you.”

I laughed at the slightly pained expression on his face as he said this and he grabbed my bags from me, loading them into his car. That was when I noticed the hair. In the low light of the street lamps, it wasn’t obvious, but now that I was really looking I could see that Jonny had dyed his hair a shade of silvery-blond. This was definitely an unusual change for him, as I couldn't recall a time I had ever seen him with dyed hair in the 27 years I had known him. He looked amazing.

“I like the hair!” I said with a small smile as Jonny opened the side door for me and I slipped into the seat.

“Right back at ya,” he grinned; it was a running joke that I had different hair colour every time I saw him.

The drive back to his parents’ house was pretty short and we spent a lot of the time laughing and joking about our childhood memories of various places along the drive.

When we arrived, Jonny insisted on carrying my bags for me, unlocking the door with his spare key and placing them under the coat rail.

“Is that my Jonnyboo?” I heard Jackie’s voice cry from the kitchen as I followed Jonny in, shutting the door behind me and toeing off my DMs.

“Yes, Mum,” Jonny replied monotonously, shrugging his coat off and hanging it by the door, revealing the light blue sweatshirt he wore underneath, before turning to me to help me out of mine. “Loving this coat, by the way!” He beamed at me, hanging it up as his mother emerged from the kitchen, “I used to have one like it, didn’t I, Mum?” He said, glaring at his mother in a way that implied she was the reason he _no longer_ had one like it.

“Did you? I can’t recall,” she said sweetly, moving to embrace me. “Hello, love,” she smiled warmly, kissing me on the cheek. “It’s so good to see you, it’s been too long!”

“Alright, Inky?” Adam grinned as he emerged from the kitchen, a blue tarpaulin in his hands.

Inky had been the boys’ nickname for me when I was younger because I spent so much time drawing that, as a result, my hands were always covered in ink. The name, of course, took on a whole new meaning now with my tattoos.

“Alright,” I smiled back, “What have you got there, Pusface?” I asked him.

“Oh, it’s for Jonny,” he said, offering up the tarp to his younger brother, “Dad says he’s not sure he’s going to be able to find the tent, can you just throw this over a tree branch and sleep under it?” Adam asked, surprisingly managing to keep a straight face.

“Is he _serious_?” Jonny fumed, snatching the tarp from Adam and turning back to me, “I’ll be right back,” he assured me, storming off in the direction of the shed. Jackie sighed.

“He’s supposed to be going camping tonight with some friends,” Adam explained to me, leading the way towards the living room.

“Very rude, if you ask me,” Jackie commented, following behind me, “Abandoning you for his other friends on your first night back in London,” she tutted.

“Oh it’s fine,” I told her, with a dismissive wave of my hand, “He asked me and I told him I didn’t mind.”

It wasn’t his fault, anyway. Initially, I had planned to arrive at the Goodmans’ Saturday evening, after I’d finished for the day at the tattoo convention, but Jackie had insisted I come for Friday night dinner, and so here I was a day early. Jonny had already made plans for Friday evening after the family dinner, and I couldn’t exactly ask him to cancel them just for me, so I had, of course, told him it was fine.

I took a seat on the sofa nearest the door and Adam and Jackie sat down on the other. Jackie asked me about my work and how my parents were doing, and I asked Adam all about his and Lucy’s baby girl, Bella, who I had seen so many photos of on Facebook. I know Jonny felt his family were embarrassing but I had always felt comfortable with them, even though they were unusual - it’s not like my family were exactly normal.

“I can’t _fucking_ believe him!” Jonny cried out in frustration, storming into the living room. I immediately noticed he was no longer wearing the sweatshirt he left in, instead, he was now clad in a slightly too-tight, every so slightly see-through white v-neck.

“Language, Jonny!” Jackie commented with a frown.

“Dad just got paint _all_ over my new sweatshirt,” Jonny said angrily, throwing his arms up in the air, “ _And_ he still can’t find the fucking tent!”

“Paint? What’s he painting?” Adam asked with a laugh.

Jonny launched into some long-winded explanation of what had happened with Martin in the shed but I was too busy staring at his torso to really pay attention. The top was definitely too tight for him, I thought to myself, who knew why he had decided to wear it. I mean, I wasn’t complaining; it clung nicely to his toned chest and rode up constantly at the waist as he moved, exposing his pale flesh and causing him to keep having to pull it back down. I wished he wouldn’t.

I had, of course, seen Jonny topless: after he had gotten that ridiculous ‘live fast, die young’ tattoo he had come to visit me in Cardiff and begged me to do a cover-up for him. I had designed a far more tasteful tattoo; a beautiful Deus de Los Muertos style woman, her dark hair flowing down Jonny’s arm to cover his previous mistake. This had been the first time I tattooed Jonny, but it was not the last. There were three other small tattoos the Goodman family didn't know about scattered across Jonny’s body, all by me. He had a small cluster of stars on his left foot - the constellation for his mum’s star sign - which he got on the same visit as the cover-up, a couple of lines of lyrics from one of his favourite songs to the right of his ribs (he had bitched and whined about the pain throughout the whole thing), and finally - my favourite - an embellished infinity symbol on his left hip, which he claimed was to symbolise our friendship (this made me go all warm and fuzzy inside, though I would never admit it to anyone).

I was still staring at Jonny by the time he’s finished his rant and Jackie was trying to calm him down. Adam, however, was looking at me curiously. I hoped desperately he hadn’t noticed me staring at Jonny and quickly excused myself to use the loo.

I leaned back against the toilet door after locking it and sighed loudly. What was I doing? I couldn’t let Jonny realise how I felt about him and Adam catching onto my crush was a surefire way for that to happen, as the older boy had always seemed to find it impossible to keep his mouth shut.

I moved towards the sink, running a hand through my brightly dyed hair as I stared at myself in the mirror. Perhaps if I just stopped with all this shit - the tattoos and the piercings and the hair dye and the dark makeup - perhaps then he would see me as a potential partner. _Perhaps then he would love me like I love him._

I shook my head. _Pull yourself togethe_ r, I told myself; these thoughts were ridiculous, this _was_ me. This was the way I _wanted_ to be and I was not going to change that for a boy, that wasn’t who I was. I was happy with the way I looked and if Jonny couldn’t see past that, there was nothing I could do. I couldn’t _make_ him love me.

I just needed to be more careful, I wasn’t used to spending time around Jonny and other people. Jonny never noticed my longing stares and lingering touches but Adam sure as hell would. I just needed to chill out a bit.

I washed my hands and made my way back to the living room, pausing when I noticed the door was pulled to.

“She looks very… different to the last time I saw her,” I could hear Jackie saying, as I approached the room quietly.

“ _Muuum_ ,” Jonny groaned. “I did warn you and you said you wouldn’t mention it.”

“I know, I know,” she sighed. “And there’s nothing wrong with it, of course!” She added hastily. “It’s just different, is all. Not the sort of girl I would expect you to bring home.”

“Well I haven’t _‘brought her home’_ , have I?” He said moodily, and I could practically hear his eye roll. “She’s just an old friend who you insisted stayed here.”

His mum mumbled something I couldn’t hear and Jonny hissed something back.

“Anyway, don’t think I have a problem with how she looks, because I don’t,” Jackie continued cheerily. “On _her_ , that is. If you ever get tattoos - or piercings - like that-” she threatened, and I heard Jonny growl in frustration. “I mean, your hair’s bad enough…”

I wasn’t an idiot, I knew Jackie didn’t like tattoos, she’d always been quite vocal about it. That’s why every tattoo I had done on Jonny was in a place his mum wouldn’t see it, except for the one on his arm, as she knew I’d given him a cover-up. I’m sure she would kill us both if she found out I’d given him more than that one.

“Hey,” came a quiet voice from behind me and I nearly jumped out of my skin, I hadn’t heard anyone approach. I spun around.

“Adam!” I whisper-shouted, a look of horror crossing my face as I realised I’d been caught eavesdropping. “I thought you were in there.”  
  
“Evidently. What they talking about?” He asked me. “How _different_ you look?”

I laughed quietly, “How did you guess?”

“I know my mother,” he smirked. “And you do look pretty different, to be fair.”

“I guess,” I nodded.

“So, about Jonny-” he began, but was cut off my Jackie opening the door.

“Oh, hello!” She said, clearly surprised to see us standing there. “I was just going to make some tea, do either of you want one?”

“Yes, please, Jackie. That would be lovely,” I responded, as Adam shook his head.

“Wonderful,” Jackie smiled, “Adam, will you come help me with them?”

Adam followed his mother into the kitchen, glancing back at me with a look that told me I wasn’t getting off that easily.

I walked into the living room to find Jonny standing by the coffee table, looking very suspicious.

“Oh,” he said, breathing a sigh of relief. “I thought you were Pusface,”

“Yes, we do look similar,” I quipped, sitting back down in my place on the sofa. “What have you done this time?” I asked.

“Hidden his wallet,” Jonny grinned, shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Very original,” I smirked back and was about to ask where but was interrupted by Martin.

“ _Shit_ on the shitting thing,” he announced loudly as he stepped into the room, topless as usual, dark green paint smeared across his chest. “Jonny, I don’t have a tent for you,” Jonny’s eyes immediately narrowed.

“I told you a _week_ ago that I needed a tent and what did you say? _‘Every man should own a tent, Jonny. I for one, own at least two.’_ ”

“That’s true,” he nodded. “Every man should own a tent, and I do.”

“Well, where is it then?” Jonny screeched, frustration clearly getting the better of him.

“I don’t know,” Martin replied calmly.

Jonny growled and kicked the foot of the sofa, immediately crying out in pain and falling back onto the seat. I would have felt sorry for him if it wasn’t so funny. The whole situation seemed utterly ridiculous to me - who got this worked up about a tent?

“Oi, stop that, you pillock!” Martin exclaimed, swatting Jonny over the head, resulting in more of the same reaction. “Oh, tea!” Martin grinned as Adam entered the room carrying two cups, he took one and immediately began gulping it down. “Quite hot, this!”

Jackie followed her oldest son into the room, her arms filled with a pile of freshly folded washing.“Martin!” She scolded. “That tea was for Y/N!”

“Don’t worry about it, Jackie, I can do without,” I smiled.  
  
“I’ll make you another in a bit, lovely,” she assured me.

Martin was eyeing me as if he’d only just realised I was there, which, to be fair, was probably the case. “Who’s this, then? Your new female?” Martin asked Jonny as he gestured towards me. “Unusual choice for you, Jonny.”

I snorted. Jackie gasped, “ _Mar_ -tin!”

“Er, no, this is not my _‘female’_ ,” Jonny said awkwardly. “This is Y/N… My best friend… Lived next door to us for fifteen years, remember?”

“Oh, blimey!” Martin said with a grin. “Well, you certainly look different!”

“So I’ve heard,” I laughed, used to Martin’s lack of filter.

“I thought you might be Jonny’s new female, you know,” Martin continued, taking a seat next to me on the sofa as Jonny grimaced openly. “He hasn’t had one in a while and we were thinking,” he lowered his voice as he leaned towards me conspiratorily. “That he might have moved on to _males_.”

I held in a laugh as Jonny spluttered, his face turning bright red.

“Brilliant,” Adam smirked, throwing himself down on top of Jonny on the other sofa, earning an aggressive shove from the younger man.

“No, I’m sure I would have heard about that, Martin,” I said with a straight face, and he nodded seriously.

“Jonnyboo,” Jackie said quickly, clearly trying to steer the conversation away from their youngest son’s sexuality. “Go make up the spare room for our lovely guest, will you.”

“Why haven’t you done that already?” Jonny questioned, clearly still annoyed about his dad’s comments and lack of tent-finding skills. “You’ve known she was coming all week.”

“Oh, very nice. As if I don’t have enough to!” Jackie snarled. “I’ve already had Adam take your bags upstairs, love,” she said to me sweetly, and I shot Adam an appreciative look. “Jonny,” she glared at her youngest son, holding out the pile of laundry towards him, he glared back at her but stood up stroppily to take it.

“Thanks so much, Jackie,” I smiled, getting up to stand next to Jonny. “I’ll help you out with that,” I said to him, placing my hand lightly on the small of his back to guide him out the room before he started an argument about something else.

“Oh, alright. Thanks,” he said, heading past his mother, out the room and upstairs to the guest room.

The guest room had been many things over the years; when I first knew the Goodmans it was the ‘junk room’ before Jackie had insisted Martin moved all his rubbish to the shed; then it was the ‘computer room’/’office’, where Jonny and I spent a lot of time when we were younger playing various computer games; now it was the guest bedroom. The computer still sat in the corner of the room but there was now a large double bed, with a matching chest of drawers and bedside table, and a mirror in the corner. It was much nicer than I remembered it. Adam had placed my bags next to the chest of drawers, presumably for me to move my clothes into for the week.

“I can’t believe Dad can’t find this bloody tent,” Jonny complained as he deposited the sheets and towel on the dresser and threw himself down on the unmade bed, an overexaggerated pout on his face.

“What’s the big deal?” I asked him with a raised eyebrow. “You’ve always hated camping and even if you _did_ like it, why would you want to go in this weather?” I gestured to the heavy rain that had begun slamming against the window.

Jonny looked a little bashful and got back up off the bed, reaching to grab the duvet sheet off the side. Ignoring my question, he began to pull it onto the duvet aggressively. I followed his lead and changed the four pillows, pulling the fitted sheet onto the mattress, before arranging the pillows neatly at the head of the bed.

“Well?” I questioned after a minute or so of awkward silence had passed and Jonny was still fumbling with the bedsheet.

“Er, well... There’s, like, festival going on tonight… And there’s also this girl,” he said finally. avoiding eye contact as he jabbed at the lumps in the badly-changed duvet.

“Oh,” I felt my heart sink a little but tried to act normal. “A _female_.”

Jonny let out a slightly pained chuckle at my lame joke, before hurriedly launching into an explanation. “I mean, it’s not like that,” he babbled, running a hand awkwardly through his hair. “It’s nothing serious, so please don’t mention it to Adam or anyone. I just met her on Tinder and- and, it’s just, I haven’t gotten laid since Lucy and I broke up-”

“You haven’t had sex in a year and a half?!” I blurted out loudly and he lunged forward to cover my mouth with his hand.

“Tell the whole street, why don’t you,” he grumbled, removing his hand from my face.

“Shit, sorry,” I muttered, wiping my mouth in mock disgust. “It’s just surprising, is all.”

“Yeah, well I’ve been busy!” He said defensively. “And it was kinda a traumatic breakup! Afterwards, I just didn’t feel like I wanted - or had time for - a proper relationship and I just- I dunno,” suddenly he looked more vulnerable than I’d seen him look in years. “Hook-ups are weird? I just find it hard to put all that trust in someone you don’t know at all?” He ran his hands over his face agitatedly. “But I’ve just been so stressed lately, I had to do something, and she seemed really nice and the whole thing seemed really convenient…” He trailed off embarrassedly.

“So that's all this is about?” I murmured, slightly bemused. “Sex?”

“Yeah, I mean, it sounds really stupid but, as I said, the whole thing sounded convenient when she suggested it? But now,” he gestured vaguely towards the door and then the window. “I don’t really think all this is worth it.” He shrugged slightly, staring at the duvet in his hands as he continued to try to straighten the thing out.

He looked so downhearted and embarrassed about the whole thing, and it genuinely seemed like he was really in need of some stress-relief. Before I could stop myself I had blurted “If that’s all it’s about, I can sleep with you!”

His head snapped up so fast it was almost comical. “Really?” He choked out, dropping the bedsheet mid-shake, a look somewhere between disbelief and amusement on his face.

I felt my face burn with embarrassment, the sudden burst of recklessness I had felt quickly dissipating. “I’m just saying... If that’s all it’s about - sex, y’know - I wouldn’t object… I mean, you said you were anxious about trust but we already trust each other, right? And it’s been a while for me too…? But it was stupid - we’re not like that… And I’m not…” I gestured to my appearance. “Please, just pretend I never suggested it!”

What was I thinking? Sure, we were close friends but I had never been Jonny’s type! He went for sexy, sophisticated women, not 27-year-olds still stuck in their teenage emo phase. I turned to leave the room but was stopped by a firm grip on my wrist. “You’re not… What?” Jonny whispered, running his thumb gently over the tattoo on my wrist. My mouth went dry and I glanced up to see a look in his eyes I had never seen before.

“I just didn’t think with the tattoos and piercings and everything, you would, y’know…” I trailed off, unsure of what exactly to say to him.

“You thought I wouldn't want to sleep with you… because of your tattoos?” Jonny asked, a look of confusion on his face.

“Among other things,” I muttered.

“Do you know how utterly ridiculous that sounds?”

The question annoyed me slightly but he didn’t give me a chance to reply before he surged forward to kiss me passionately, pulling me close to him. I was shocked, never in a million years did I think something like this could happen between me and Jonny, but I had loved him for so long that even if this was nothing more than a way for him to relieve stress, I was going to make the most of it. My free hand instinctively moved to tangle in his messy hair and he moaned quietly into the kiss, dropping my wrist and moving one hand to my bum and the other up my outer thigh and under my skirt, where it came to an abrupt stop.

“Jesus Christ,” he groaned against my lips. “Are you wearing stockings with garters?”

“Yes,” I hissed defensively. “I always wear them with skirts.”

“You are actually unreal. Did you not think they were maybe a bit kinky for a casual evening at your best friend’s parents’ house?” He grinned cheekily, spinning us around and throwing me onto the bed, scattering the pillows I had neatly arranged. His mouth was back on mine before I could come up with any sort of comeback. His hand quickly found its way to my waist, untucking my blouse from my skirt before moving up under, tentatively touching my skin. I bucked up against him and he smiled into our kiss.

“Let’s get this off you,” he muttered as he pulled away slightly, making fast work of the buttons on my blouse. He gaped at me as the shirt fell open, revealing my lacy black bra, and the tattoos peeking out from under it. “I thought I knew about all your tattoos,” he murmured as he lightly traced what was visible of the small snake between my breasts and the mandala design on my underbust.

“All of them except these two,” I assured him as he moved from tracing the tattoo lines to caressing my breasts through my bra. “Fuck,” I gasped, my hips bucking up again.

I could feel Jonny’s hard length pressing against me through his jeans and decided it was time to speed things up a bit. “Off,” I growled, tugging at the hem of his T-shirt.

Needless to say, after all the tattoos I had given him, I was fairly familiar with Jonny’s torso, so I was surprised when he pulled off his top to reveal a new tattoo on his toned chest, just over his heart. I was pleased to see he had actually taken the time to research into good artists this time, as the new tattoo was beautiful. It was a compass with a scroll wrapping around it, and on the scroll were words in Latin.

“What does it mean?” I asked breathlessly as I ran my fingers over it. “Not ‘live fast, die young’ again, is it?” I joked.

“Just for that, you don’t get to know,” he smirked, pressing me back down into the bed and beginning to kiss and bite my neck. I moaned, hooking one of my legs over his hip in an attempt to bring him closer. “Hush,” he muttered next to my ear. “We’re not the only people in the house, remember?” He covered my mouth for the second time that evening but this time I couldn’t stop the moan that escaped me. “Oh, you like that, do you?” He grinned mischievously, “I’m really learning a lot about you today...”

I was too turned on to be embarrassed about how I was acting towards my best friend. I fumbled with the belt on Jonny’s jeans before undoing his flies, his hand still covering my mouth - or it was, at least, until I began touching him through his pants. He moved to steady himself on the bed as his mouth dropped open slightly, a low moan escaping him as his eyes flickered shut.

“Who’s being noisy now?” I teased, withdrawing my hand to push at his jeans, hinting for him to take them off.

He pushed himself up off me but instead of taking his own trousers off, he unzipped the side of my skirt, pulling it off in one swift movement and leaving me in just my underwear and the long black stockings attached to my studded thigh garters.

“Fuck. You’re something else, you know that?” He sighed as he looked down at me, flushed with arousal.

I covered my face with my hands, suddenly feeling self-conscious under his gaze, but he was having none of it. He prised them away from my face, pulling them up to hold firmly above my head with just one of his hands. I tried my hardest to suppress a whimper at this action but failed dismally. Jonny’s eyes filled with glee.

“Y/N,” he said evenly, raising an eyebrow at me as a lop-sided grin formed on his face. “Are you into BDSM?”

I flushed. “Are you really surprised?” I replied dismissively, struggling slightly in his grip.

His smile widened and he released my hands, moving to lift me a little so he could unfasten the catch of my bra. Suddenly I felt unsure about what we were doing; surely things would be different between us if he actually saw me naked? I grabbed ahold of his hands where they had moved to pull down the straps from my shoulders.

“Second thoughts?” He whispered, smiling softly at me, no trace of his usual mockery in his face or voice - just understanding - and that was all it took for me to release his hands. I loved him and I knew he loved me too, even though it wasn’t in the same way, he wouldn’t let this fuck things up between us.

He pulled down my bra straps slowly, as if giving me time to stop him again if I wanted to, but I had made up my mind. Jonny removed my bra, dropping it onto the small pile of clothes on the floor, his eyes full of lust as he hungrily took in the sight before him. My hand found its way back to his cock and I began stroking it again through his pants, my other hand pushing his trousers further down his legs.

“Here, here, let me-” Johnny moaned, standing shakily to strip down to his boxers, revealing a small wet patch of precum on the front of them.

I expected him to come straight back to the bed but he began pulling his belt from the loops of his jeans. I looked at him, puzzled, as he approached me with it.

“Come on, then,” he said expectantly. “Hands up” and my jaw dropped slightly.

He chuckled at my reaction as I eagerly followed his instruction, reaching up to grip the bars of the headboard as he wound the belt around and fastened it tightly. I groaned as I strained against the soft leather, Jonny smiled wickedly from above me.

“I’m going to take these off now,” he told me, his hands hovering hesitantly on the waistband of my knickers, waiting for permission. I nodded eagerly.

Jonny pulled the lacey panties down, over my knees and I wriggled out of them, kicking them to the floor. Still standing above me, his eyes widened slightly at the sight before him and the damp patch on the front of his boxers darkened. He palmed himself lightly as he took in my near-naked form, licking his lips.

“I’m going to leave these on you,” he announced at his hand traced its way up the side of my leg, along my stockings, over my garters, coming to rest on my hip. His thumb made little swiping motions on my hipbone, the light pressure causing my back to arch off the bed, my arms pulling at the restraints.

“Uh-huh,” I said with heavy-lidded eyes, too turned on to bother speaking properly.

Jonny spread my legs, his fingers immediately finding my wetness and pushing in gently, one at a time, drawing whimpers from me as he turned me into a shaking mess. His other hand deftly massaged my left breast while his mouth attacked my right. The whole time, his boxer-clad length was brushing against my leg and I so desperately wanted to touch him.

“Jonny,” I moaned, my eyes fluttering shut as he flicked my right nipple with his tongue and his thumb moved skillfully against my clit. “Jonny, take your pants off for fuck’s sake.”

“Bossy,” he laughed, nipping at my breast lightly. “Who would’ve guessed you’d be such a brat in the bedroom?”

He stood up again and pulled his pants down, stepping out of them as they dropped to the floor. I gazed at him from my place on the bed, my eyes roaming over his body from head to toe, and back up again, coming to a halt on his cock. It was a good size, definitely larger than average without being intimidatingly big and it was, of course, circumcised. My mouth watered at the sight of it and my breathing grew faster at the thought of having it inside of me.

Jonny looked very uncomfortable under my gaze. “It’s not much, but it does the job,” he said, immediately on the defensive.

 _I swear I have never met a more self-conscious boy_ , I thought to myself, as I rolled my eyes at him, _always expecting people to make fun of him.  
_ _  
_Any other time I would have tried to comfort him, but I was currently tied to the headboard of his parents’ guest bed, naked, and I really just wanted him to stick his dick in me, not cry to me about its size. “Are you actually serious right now?” I questioned. “Do I look disappointed?”

“No…” He answered slowly, as if trying not to get caught out by a trick question. “You look pretty turned on, actually,” he admitted.

“And you’re the only person who can do something about that,” I said breathlessly. “So hurry up and fucking do it.”

“Fucking hell, woman, you’re gonna be the death of me,” Jonny groaned, scrambling for his jeans and grabbing a condom from his wallet, hastily rolling it on before climbing back onto the bed and kissing me fiercely.

I could feel his cock pressed up against my thigh, mere inches from the one place I wanted it to be. “Are you sure you want this?” He asked me seriously, tucking a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “‘Cause I will absolutely understand if you don’t want to go through with it.”

There it was again, that insecurity shining through his confident facade. Of course I wanted it - wanted _him_ \- so badly, always had, and besides, we’d kind of come too far to turn back now.

“Will you please stop fucking around and just get your dick inside me?” I growled, arching up to rub myself against him, desperate for some kind of friction.

“Whatever you say, Princess,” he smirked, holding me steady as he lined himself up with my entrance and pushed in so achingly slowly I could hardly handle it.

My mouth fell open in a long moan, head falling back against the pillows as Jonny stretched me open. As he bottomed out inside me a mildly amusing look of shocked bliss crossed his face but as soon as his hand moved to my hip and he began slowly thrusting in and out, my amusement was quickly replaced with another huge wave of arousal.

“Fuck, Jonny, you feel incredible,” I gasped, beginning to move in time with his thrusts. He seemed too overwhelmed to say anything but began biting and sucking at my neck again. I was sure he was leaving marks but, in that moment, I couldn’t bring myself to care.

I let out a particularly loud moan when he bit down on my collarbone and he pulled away to look down at me silently, momentarily slowing his movements. I pulled against my restraints as I tried to follow him, my hands clenching and unclenching above my head.

The sound of my name broke our silence, low and dark in a way I’d never heard Jonny speak it before. “Look at you,” he groaned, his voice dripping with arousal. “Never thought I’d get to see you like this.”

Before I had a chance to attempt to make sense of his words, he was back to fucking me, harder and faster than before. The ‘quiet’ rule had clearly been forgotten, as a mess of moans and profanities spilled from both our mouths as Jonny drove his cock deep inside me, brushing against my sweet spot.

“Fuck! There, Jonny, don’t stop!”  
  
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he grunted out, still his cheeky self even in such a state of arousal.

His thrusts grew harder, more frantic, and each time his body slammed into mine it drew me a little closer to my orgasm. I was shaking, panting, as I grew closer and closer, gazing up at my best friend and the object of my affection for so many years. His hair had fallen into his face and was damp with sweat, a light sheen of it also plastering his face, his lips were parted in a shuddering breath as our eyes met. I had never seen anything more perfect in my life. Suddenly I couldn’t hold it together any longer.  
  
“Jonny, I’m so close,” I whined.

His hand moved to my neck, tracing along the nape before plunging into my hair, pulling me close as my back arched up into him and my calves slipped further up his thighs.

“Then come for me, babe,” he whispered in my ear, reaching between us to stroke my clit as he rocked his hips just right, hitting my sweet spot over and over as pleasure racked my entire body. My walls clenched around him and I felt him follow me over the edge, panting and bucking up messily into me as we rode out our orgasms together.

I was still in a state of utter bliss when Jonny gently pulled out and rolled off of me, quickly disposing of the used condom and grabbing the freshly-changed duvet cover from where he had dropped it at the end of the bed. He laid down next to me and pulled the cover up over us, his head falling back against the pillow next to mine.

“That was… incredible,” he panted, his hand coming up to sweep the strands of sweat-soaked hair from his face.

“Yeah,” my body was trembling slightly and I was still tied to the bed, but Jonny seemed too out of it to notice. There was a faint buzzing noise coming from somewhere on the floor and I realised it was probably Jonny’s mobile. “Phone’s ringing, I think,” I told him, nudging him slightly with my foot.

“Probably not important,” he groaned as he rolled off the bed and fished the mobile out of his jean pocket. “Eugh, work. I’m on holiday!” He quickly ended the call with a swipe to the screen. He swiped a couple more notifications away before I saw his eyes widen comically. “Shit. There’s a text from Adam!” He exclaimed, suddenly way more alert than he had been mere seconds before. “‘ _Mum wants to know if you’re coming back down, she says dinner’s ready in ten_ ’. Shit, that was five minutes ago!” He dived for his clothes and began to quickly pull each piece on.

When he finished with his jeans he began searching frantically on the floor, presumably looking for his belt. I cleared my throat loudly and he looked up at me, realising my hands were still tied to the headboard with the very thing he was trying to find.

“Ah, shit, sorry!” He cried, lunging forward to unbuckle me, just as a knock sounded at the door.

“Guys?” Came Adam’s voice from outside, Jonny’s eyes widened. “Are you in there?”

“Don’t come in!” I squeaked immediately. “I’m- uh- changing!”

“You’re changing?” Adam questioned, sounding justifiably confused. “Is Jonny still in there with you?”

I looked at him expectantly and he spoke up. “Uh, yes?” He said, but it sounded more like a question than a statement. “I’m… helping?”

If my hands had been free I would have facepalmed.

 _What the fuck?_ I mouthed to Jonny and he gave an over-exaggerated shrug, a look of utter panic on his face.

“You’re helping,” Adam said flatly, clearly not buying what was going on at all. “Okay. Well, I just came up to tell you that Mum says dinner will be ready in about five minutes, so it would be great if you guys could come down. Once Jonny has finished helping you get dressed, of course, Inky,” he added.

I held my breath until I heard Adam’s footsteps reach the bottom of the stairs and his voice in the distance saying something about how we’d be down soon.

“Jonathan, if my hands were free right now, the things I would do to you…” I trailed off angrily.

“Sexy things?” He asked, embarrassingly hopefully.

“Definitely not,” I growled. “Now hurry up and untie me so I can get dressed before we embarrass ourselves even more.”

After telling Adam that Jonny was helping me change I felt like I had to wear at least a different top to dinner, so I fished around in my bag and pulled out a long-sleeved, black velvet top, with a zip up the back in case anyone was checking up on why I needed help changing.

I felt nervous as I dressed in silence, not knowing quite what to say to Jonny, but knowing something must be said before we headed back downstairs. The sex had been absolutely amazing, but I was already feeling like it may have been a mistake. Before I didn’t know what I was missing out on but now that I’d actually been with Jonny I’d be craving that feeling for the rest of my life.

However, I didn’t want to get into a friends-with-benefits type situation and have my heart broken even more than I had already allowed it to be with my reckless actions, so I knew I had to straighten everything up with Jonny.

“Jonny-” I began, right at the moment he started saying something to me. He laughed, gesturing for me to go first and I continued shakily. “As absolutely great as that was - and it really was amazing - I need to be clear: it didn’t mean anything. You were stressed, I was stressed, we needed a way to relieve that stress. It was really, really good but I don’t wanna mess up our friendship with some kind of fuckbuddies arrangement, do you get me? So, I think it’s best if this was just a one-time thing, okay?” I breathed deeply, thankful I managed to get all of that out without crying or accidentally admitting my feelings for him.

Jonny looked at me, a strange expression on his face and nodded once. “I understand,” he told me, reaching for the door handle. “Shall we go join my crazy family for dinner?”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed...
> 
> I've never written smut before so please be kind if you comment!
> 
> Initially, I'm posting this as a one-shot but if anyone is interested in reading more (much less smutty, as I do have an actual story idea already planned out) let me know in the comments & I'll write it ^_^


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